I have to be completely honest: since quarantine began I have gone through phases of organization and disorganization and the rapid whiplash of not maintaining an actual schedule or balance in my life is driving me insane. There are weeks when I do my hair and makeup every day, and others when I stay in pj’s all day. There are weeks when I am eating “clean” healthy foods and working out, and others when I binge and eat potato chips and ice cream for days on end (usually followed by copious glasses of Cabernet Sauvignon). There are mornings where I start off by stretching and meditating, and others where I am woken up by a crying toddler.

That was probably a lot of unloading for an opening blog statement, and for that I do apologize. However, I decided to use this post as a way for me to regroup, refocus, and hold myself accountable. Yesterday I was looking at my agenda and was horrified to realize that I have not actually written anything down in the time slots. Rather, I acquired a stack of disheveled sticky notes with vague appointment times, assignment names, and dinner recipes. I think this was my breaking point and I told myself, Enough is enough.

If you’ve bopped around my blog a bit, you would know that I am a huge fan of self-care (see here and here). In my philosophy on self-care, I believe that the practice is not always exciting or fun. In reality, self-care is sometimes painful and necessary. Do I want kale instead of red velvet cake? No, of course not. Do I like to-do lists? Nope! However, these things keep me focused, healthy, and productive and are essential to my overall well-being.

I am usually so good at keeping up with an actual self-care routine and I think this is why I am feeling so frustrated. I need to start committing myself again to activities that encourage actual self-care. I know that quarantine has been difficult for everyone. Let’s be honest: the entirety of 2020 has been difficult! However, this year will end. These bad times will end. None of this is forever, but my sanity is and I need to start focusing more on its well-being.

I do want to clarify something, though: I am not against taking a break. Sometimes you need the red velvet cake and to stay in pj’s all day. However, when these things become the routine there is an issue. With that being said, I do plan on writing a follow-up to this post soon. The follow-up will probably be in a few weeks. If I pretended that I magically fixed my self-care issues in a matter of three days, I would be a liar.

Be well and safe, everyone.