By Age 30 You Should…

…stop caring about other’s opinions about your success.

If you’re on Twitter, you’ve probably seen the latest trend of, “By 30 you should… be married, own a house, have a retirement plan, be on baby #3, etc.” I cannot be the only person who loathes this kind of advice. Like most Twitter trends, these lists have become satirical and include things like owning a pet alligator, but the trend started somewhere in a serious vein.

In general, I’m weary of social media trends and have recently wrote about a similar subject. I genuinely believe that these trends are usually an attempt to showcase moral superiority and make other people envious. In addition to the cruelty of trying to emotionally harm others, there are a lot of other problems with this trend.

It’s Relative to the Time Period

In today’s world, one of these advice lists might include things like owning a house, having kids, furthering one’s career, etc. However, this list would have looked a lot different a few decades ago. For example, for women, the list might not include having a career or attending college because that was not the norm. Or, maybe the list now includes owning an electric car. This wouldn’t have been possible a few decades ago.

Saying “By 30, you…” implies a universality to events that are simply not universal. And guess what? The list will look different again in a few decades.

It is Unnecessary Pressure

Life’s hard, right? Sometimes life is very hard and even getting out of bed in the morning is a win for some people. Societal pressure from strangers online is not worth anyone’s time or energy. If you’re doing the best you can in the moment, that’s really all that matters at the end of the day.

We Live in a Weird World Right Now…

This last point I am going to write about is honestly kind of a combination of my last two points. The world we live in right now includes a pandemic that kept everyone in their homes for two years, a very unforgiving housing market that is not ideal for buyers, very expensive gas and grocery lists, political division… the list goes on.

How can being married with multiple children by 30 be the norm for everyone when no one left their homes for years to date (or really do anything, for that matter)? How can owning a house be the norm by 30 when the housing market is a dumpster fire?

I am by no means suggesting that this is the worst period of human history. I am not that naive and did pay attention in school. However, this is not the best time, either, and cutting ourselves some slack while we figure everything out is essential for our overall well-being.

That’s all, Folks!

Cut yourself some slack. And stop paying attention to the opinions of strangers online. You don’t need their validation (and you never did).

*Hopping off soap box now*

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